Which bar has the most sexy girls?

I don't know, but if you are looking for a party with girls in the most sexy costumes, Atlantic bar is certainly in the top list.
Check out their mermaids and location on the site. Atlantic can be found in North pattaya, second road.

Mmm, I think you can guess the "dress code" for this week when you look at the girl on the left... ;-)

Good old times

A bikini contest in the early nineties:
Looking at these pictures makes me wish for a time machine...

Darts, pattaya style

This is how the ladies in Pattaya play darts. Wanna pose?

Where the f**k is my bike?

A warning for people who never came to Pattaya before:
IF you rent a motorbike (which is a bad idea for several reasons, better stick with the Bahtbus or just walk), don't park it where you shouldn't.

I went to my favorite restaurant on second road, left my bike where I think it is OK (behind the lines), but when I came out of the restaurant it was gone. Again!
Though I could guess the answer to my question, I asked the girls outside in Thai English: "You see motorbike me?". Answer of the sweeties: "Police take. Many many".

Went to the police station, and yes, I parked my motorbike in a prohibited area. 500 baht please. After a polite remark that I'm almost sure I was right about the lines, got away with 200 baht. I know any more discussion is useless, it is just a little game, the "collect as many farang motorbikes as you can in no time"-game.
Shouting will get you nowhere.

The little good thing in Thailand is, that even fines can be bargained...;-)

Euro2008: time for a sexy break

Has nothing to do with Pattaya, but... just because I like this movie so much, and I hope you don't mind...:-)

5 reasons to quit smoking

I was just thinking about a few possible reasons:

1) Better sex: yeah, the main reason why I quit myself (got out of breath every time)
2) (Thai) girls will like you more, your chances will skyrocket (I don't know any country where hygiene and body care is more important; shower before sex, shower after sex...)
3) You can reach the upper floor in Royal garden plaza, without having to go back downstairs and outside for another shot because you're not allowed to smoke in any building.
4) 1 month no smoking = 1 FREE Ticket in Sabai room body massage (all options included)
5) 1 year no smoking = 1 FREE Ticket to Koh Chang with your number one Gogo girl of choice!
(pic: Euro2008, German frontline...:-))

To smoke, or not to smoke

To smoke or not to smoke, that's the question! I don't know if the smoking ban is a good thing or not. I tend to say not. I am NOT a smoker myself, since I quit almost 4 years ago now, but I believe it would be better to leave everyone the choice to smoke or not to smoke. As long as someone doesn't blow his smoke right in my face, I don't really care.
20% wants to smoke, so, just let it be. There are already too much rules in this world, and life is too short to keep mourning!

22 acacia avenue is somewhere in Pattaya

Don't know what is wrong with that little soi 6/1, the street next to soi 6, but I got into a troublesome situation there twice now!
The first time was my own stupid fault (in fact, the second too...) as I wanted to go to the beachroad from second road, it was in the middle of the night, all the action in soi 6 is finished by then (I didn't have to fear any girls literally taking me by the balls), but still, I decided to go to the beach through soi 6/1 for a change, and began to regret this after a few steps, when I realized it is not a good idea to walk in this small dark street alone. Almost in the middle of soi 6/1, three ladyboys came out of nowhere and blocked my way, clearly not with any good intensions.
The one in the middle had a knife (didn't see it up close but I'm pretty sure it was not his lollipop), the two others moved quickly behind me, and the way they surrounded me was not because they wanted to propose me to smoke my cigar.
"Where you go darling?", ladyboy one asked me while the 2 others were smiling, getting too close and breathing in my neck.
I am certainly not a hero in these situations, but this time, don't ask me why, I stayed calm and answered his question with another question: "You know where I can find ATM?".
This COULD be a stupid question as they might propose to accompany me to get some money and hand them over, but in this case I knew very well there is only an ATM at the beach road or back in second road, where there is enough people even at 3 or 5 in the morning. Asking for an ATM seemed a better believable reply instead of simply telling him I didn't have any money when he didn't ask for it yet.
In fact, I couldn't escape and wanted to win some time, and yes, I was lucky a few farangs entered the street from beachroad, so I pointed to the beach side and said: 'I think there, right?'
Ladyboy one looked briefly, saw the farangs, and put away his lollipop. I said good evening, smiled and started walking past him without looking back. For a moment my heart rate was going in overdrive... :-)

PS Even though Pattaya is pretty safe overall, I got into problems another time, again soi 6/1 but this was daytime, I didn't expect to have any kind of problems (this time however just another ladyboy bothering me in a very agressive way, not to steal my money, but probably just because he was on yaba or something).

Pussy out of service? No pompem!

More football...

A link to Italian football here and a nice wallpaper there

Soccer? Can be nice...:-)

They are all watching television, excellent time to screw someone else his girl... (yes I'm bad, but you know what is printed on the t-shirt: good guys go to heaven, bad guys go to Pattaya...)

She my sister!

When you're talking with 2 bargirls, one of them might tell you: "She my sister!".

They are not really sisters, but in this case 'my sister' means something like: "My very best friend, the only one I can always trust and will always be there to support each other!".
As you might expect, sisters come and go easily in a rapid changing barworld, where money and jealousy are lurking around every corner. Even buddhism cannot always keep this danger away.
But I know a few sisters that are "sisters" for a very loooong time (not these sexy 2 sirens in the picture).

Pattaya beer garden

The menu in the beergarden has been updated. The food is excellent, the views are great, the music is perfect.
So, what is wrong?
It is still too quiet there, but I wouldn't mind if I were you. Maybe this will all change when the next high season is coming, but for now, don't count on the single ladies if you want some company. To be honest, it's not a bad thing to have some relaxing time on your own in chaotic Pattayaaa...:-)

Don't do it at the floor

Signs in Thailand, always funny...

And as everyone is talking about football, here are some interesting pictures from the game yesterday (in Dutch, but just scroll down) or a nice wallpaper here :-)

Let's play football in the room!

I don't really care about euro2008, and it looks to me that a lot of Thai guys (and ladies) are betting all their money on it, something that happens every 2 years...
You won't find me in a bar during those days, between drunk guys watching the same goals all day long, complaining about missed penalties etc, and asking my opinion, looking for a reason to start a little fight.

But I guess there is no escape: every place in Pattaya has at least one television, but only one channel it seems.

Even the bargirls look football, dreaming about marrying any of those sexy, "big money"-22 players on the field, ...until the 90 minutes are over, and they have to look again at no-style-Farang Pum puy who just barfined them, and finishes his last beer before leaving to his cheap charlie-room. That's life, and we all have our dreams sometimes...

When I see a site like THIS one, football gets a little bit more interesting... and I start to dream too, about actually being one of those 22, forgetting the bargirl sitting next to me.

And this girl is wearing the wrong t-shirt, but she's playing very well: penalty kick for me, and she is the goalkeeper...;-)

The best bars to get a stiff... neck

Beavers has all the needed ingredients to leave the bar with a stiff neck: the place is rather narrow, girls are dancing on your table (sometimes missing some essential underwear), and there are quite a few sexy ones that will keep you looking up.

If you had too much beer you can give up keeping your head up, look down in the mirrored glass, and you'll still see ...beavers...:-)

Bars and the girls are changing all the time in Pattaya, but in Beavers they should take some new pictures for the website (they don't do any justice now)

If you like this bar, you might also like the Beach Club with a little bit more space, located in soi 15, and close to mistys which is linked to this beavers, and moved away from soi pattayaland2.
But, stiff neck again...;-)

Who said Pattaya is for bad guys?

In Thailand almost everyone is Bhuddist. And some people say Pattaya is one big brothel?
What? I've never seen a bar here! The only thing I know of is the church.
Okay, they may believe you at home about the Crocodile farm, or Nong Nooch tropical garden, but nobody will believe a story about going to a church in Pattaya...:-)

However, there really IS a church (but I confess I've never been there).

Funny is the way some people in Thailand have become a Christian. I discovered some Thai logic, no joking...:

A bargirl told me she had become a Christian: "Me go church every day!". WOW! Good girl! So I asked her why she goes boom boom with farang every day again when she is a Christian; these two things doesn't really fit together, don't you think?
"Boom boom no pompem! Go church again!". So, why no problem?
Well, she goes to the church to confess all her sins since yesterday, and God forgives them. Every single day the same trick!

Now that is convenient! When I have a problem with you because I've been cheating you, I will tell you to wait, I go the church for some confession, and everything will be fine, nothing to worry about, but the following day I will cheat you again of course... :-)

Love me tender!

More then 30 years after his dead, and far away in Thailand, you would never think about Elvis.
But in Pattaya he is still popular, and you have a good chance to find one of his imitators during your holiday here, without having to look for it.

This is the "Thai" Elvis, the one you can find near walking street. But there are others, so if you are still an Elvis fan, Pattaya is the place to be!!!

You could sleep in the Elvis room in Hard rock Hotel Pattaya (if the price is no point...), after going to some Elvis Pub.

And if you are not an Elvis fan, well, after listening to "Hotel California" (Eagles) again and again and again (I think this is the song every Thai live music band plays every evening, at least once...), you'll be glad to hear something else.

Here are some links:
www.ritchienewton.com

http://www.rotaryelvis.com

zab bar

The (im)possibility of traditional massage in Pattaya

Traditional massage has nothing to do with sex. You keep your clothes on (some kind of pyjama) and they work your back and legs, all your muscles, which might hurt a little bit.
Nothing wrong with it.
Another option is the oil massage, in this case you'll have to be naked. But again, no sex. Oh no!
Don't you even dare to think about that, you naughty boy!
And if you start having a problem, think about some ugly grandma.

Easy huh? Now you should try to be a good boy in Jan's massage for example, soi 11 (honey), between second road and soi buakhow. Or you could go in this same street to Culture club massage, or Sawasdee, etc
It looks like a place for a serious, decent traditional massage, however...

I went there with the intention to be very serious, only coming to the place for a real traditional massage.

But let me tell you why it is pretty impossible, and suppose YOU are Mr Serious in Pattaya, trying to avoid any sexual encounter:

The problems already start before you enter the place as the massage ladies are not old, ugly, boring women in long sleeves here, but young, sexy girls dressed in booty shorts.

It would help a little if they would be rude while proposing their services, but they will tell you with a big smile how handsome you are, asking if you'd like some... mmmmm ooooh ... oil massage... while showing their tongue and winking to you.
No problem to keep your dignity if you are Mr Serious, as you can just deny all this jiggy-jig talk easily.

Now, after deciding on that decent oil massage, a sexy girl will lead you upstairs to the second floor, smiling at you all the time. The stairs are steep, and it doesn't help again to look up, only to see her great ass shaking just above your nose.
Once year arrive near the massage beds, each separated by curtains, the girl will be rude for one time and command you: "take off!". This rudeness however doesn't help at all to keep your little one at sleep, as these girls have something sexy in everything they say.

She might be a good girl if you are lucky, not looking while you get undressed or even go away for a minute.
But if she keeps looking while you have to uncover your willy, think about that ugly grandma again, get on the bed, ass up and face down.
Mission completed, and now you'll be safe for a while as she will always start the massage with your back.

She'll get the oil and sit on top of you. No problems, or maybe a little bit, because you'll feel that sexy ass, the same ass you've inevitably been looking at on the stairs. Her small hands will rub your back with oil, your legs, etc until she will be sliding a little bit too far, and you will feel one of those small hands touching your balls. "ooops, me sorry".
Maybe you'll hear another girl behind the curtains who starts giggling. Now, Mr Serious, you have a problem and from now on, it will only get worse, as this is the beginning of a never ending attack on that dignity of yours.

After a minute, you'll hear: "ooops, me sorry again", the small hand sliding a little bit further this time. A moment later, she'll be only massaging that middle part, making you sweat.

Time to think about that old grandma again? Nope, too late, as of this moment she will tell you: "Turn!".
Time to confess you have a little problem down there, Mr Serious...
2 naughty eyes will look at your middle now. Oh? What happen, Sir!!!? giggle giggle and she'll grab something that will be hard as a rock by now.

I guess I leave the end of the story up to your imagination, but even if you've never been to Pattaya, I think you'll agree that a lot of traditional massage doesn't end the way it was intended to, originally....;-)

You can find easily "no sex" massage in Jomtien or some places in Naklua road or beach road too, but near second road? Forget about it...

(pic: Thai model May pitchanart)